


Rocking the Boat

by lol-phan-af (lol_phan_af)



Series: 1-800-did-I-ask [45]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Kinda, Multi, Texting, Thunderstorms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-17
Packaged: 2018-08-09 06:46:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7790983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lol_phan_af/pseuds/lol-phan-af
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>johnn: so like,,,,,does anyone wanna go on a lunch date</p><p>more like HUNKules: I'm currently eating lunch with the guy who calls me his lifesaver</p><p>more like HUNKules: on a boat</p><p>johnn: hercules what the fuck</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rocking the Boat

**johnn** : so like,,,,,does anyone wanna go on a lunch date

**more like HUNKules** : I'm currently eating lunch with the guy who calls me his lifesaver

**more like HUNKules** : on a boat

**johnn** : hercules what the fuck

**more like HUNKules** : it waSNT REALLY A CHOICE HE LIKE INSISTED ON IT??

**little lion** : WHY

**more like HUNKules** : IDK AS A THANK YOU FOR MAKING HIM FOUR PAIRS OF KHAKIS??

**more like HUNKules** : ITS A REALLY BIG BOAT

**more like HUNKules** : THEY HAVE A LOT OF BUTTERSCOTCHES IN CUTE LITTLE GLASS BOWLS

**laf** : is our boyfriend really being kidnapped rn

**more like HUNKules** : his name is william and he's really nice

**little lion** : and also apparently really rich

**more like HUNKules** : I've been informed that this is a yacht

**more like HUNKules** : by his super nice wife whos wearing a really big sun hat and just generally slaying

**more like HUNKules** : she just asked me if I have a girlfriend who's gonna tell her

**laf** : oh god

**more like HUNKules** : me, sweating: "actually I have two boyfriends and one signifcant other"

her, drinking pink lemonade out of a wine glass: "oh well that's fine I suppose, as long as you're not cheating. if you are then we'll have to throw you overboard"

**laf** : ME

**more like HUNKules** : she's teLLING ME ABOUT THE ISLANDS THEYVE GONE TO??

**little lion** : STOP TEXTING US AND LISTNENE

**more like HUNKules** : OKAY TTYL

\---

**johnn** : what if hercules is the next jay gatsby

**laf** : well okay first of all no

**little lion** : second of all no

**laf** : third of all besides the fact that he's on a boat what other part could apply to him

**johnn** : that's up to him

**little lion** : I

**laf** : are you planning for our boyfriend to kill someone and then get killed

**johnn** : oh shit right

**johnn** : no I would very much like for him to stay alive

**laf** : same so let's hope he lives!!

**johnn** : !!!

**little lion** : I

\---

**more like HUNKules** : THUNDERSTORM VERY BAD I AM BELOW DECK AND WE ARE R O CK IN G

**more like HUNKules** : WAIT FUCKCK IS ALEX OKAY

**laf** : HE'S OKAY WE'RE LISTENING TO THE DREAMGIRLS SOUNDTRACK AND SITTING ON THE FLOOR IN A CIRCLE WHILE EATING LEFTOVER NOODLES

**more like HUNKules** : GOOD

**laf** : ARE YOU OKAY

**more like HUNKules** : IDK THE GUY SAID WE SHOULD BE FINE AS LONG AS IT DOESNT GET ANY WORSE

**laf** : BE SAFE

**more like HUNKules** : ILL TRY

\---

**more like HUNKules** : UPDATE: IT GOT WORSE

**laf** : OH NO

**laf** : NONONONONONONONONONONO YOU CAN'T DIE

**more like HUNKules** : AS IF I WOULD EVER DO THAT TO YOU

**laf** : YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO

**more like HUNKules** : I W O N T

**laf** : WHATS GOING ON

**more like HUNKules** : WE'RE ROCKING V V A LOT AND I AM OFFICIALLY SCARED

**little lion** : JUST TRY AND BREATHE I GUESS??

**little lion** : IM NOT VERY GOOD AT HANDLING THESE SITUATIONS WHEN IT COMES TO ME SO IDK ABOUT YOU

**little lion** : even tho I probably know you better than I know me,,,,,

**more like HUNKules** : babe

**little lion** : WHERE ARE WILLIAM AND HIS WIFE

**more like HUNKules** : WILLIAM IS FOR SOME REASON ABOVE DECK STILL TRYIING TO STEER AND HIS WIFE WHOSE NAME IS MARY IS HERE TRYING TO PROTECT HER FANCY PAINTINGS FROM BEIN THROWN AROUND

**little lion** : who even puts fancy paintings on boats

**more like HUNKules** : people who can afford to buy more fancy paintings

**little lion** : true

**more like HUNKules** : IM BEING ASKED TO HELP ILL BE BACK

**little lion** : B E. S A F E.

**more like HUNKules** : I WILL

**laf** : WE LOVE YOU

\---

**more like HUNKules** : THE STORM IS OVER!!!!

**little lion** : F R E E D O M

**more like HUNKules** : the sky looks really pretty now

**more like HUNKules** : not as pretty as any of you tho

**little lion** : huSH

**laf** : HEHREHCEHFURHHAHDG

**johnn** : FIRE!!!!!!!!!!! HELLFIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!

**little lion** : and I'm the arsonist in this family??

**johnn** : THIS FIRE IN MY SKIN!!!!

**johnn** : this burning,,!,,,,,

**johnn** : DESIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**little lion** : end this

**johnn** : IS TURNING ME TO SIN!!

**more like HUNKules** : when have you ever been turned to anything else

**johnn** : ITS NOT MY FAULT!!!

**laf** : well it wasn't all us I can tell you that

**johnn** : YOU KNOW WHAT IM QUOTING

**laf** : YES BUT MY POINT STILL STANDS

**more like HUNKules** : are you trying to seduce us

**johnn** : idk maybe??

**more like HUNKules** : idk when I'm getting home

**johnn** : rude

**more like HUNKules** : we haven't even docked yet

**more like HUNKules** : we're celebrating the fact that we lived and she has wine I gotta go

**laf** : oh dear god

**johnn** : you better not drive home

**more like HUNKules** : WE WONT

\---

**little lion** : what is with hercules and old people tho

**johnn** : idk he's really tall and MUSCLES and Very Very cute

**johnn** : and then just to add INSULT to injury he's just so nice and amazing

**little lion** : you just called the fact that he's nice and insult

**little lion** : that's the oPPOSITE OF AN INSULT

**johnn** : IT HURTS ME

**johnn** : THEREFORE IT INSULTS ME HOW BEAUTIFULLY ENDEARING HE IS

**johnn** : ANYWAY HE'S JUST REally sweet and his smile is NICE™

**little lion** : rt I love him

**johnn** : saME

**more like HUNKules** : you guys are realyl cute

**little lion** : he's gonna be so wine drunk by the time he gets home

**more like HUNKules** : I'm jsut a little tipsy

**johnn** : how many of your words are being autocorrected

**more like HUNKules** : roughyl half of em

**johnn** : okay

**more like HUNKules** : SHE HAS HARDCROE THIGNS

**johnn** : NO

**more like HUNKules** : SHOT HSOT SHOT S SHOTS SHOT SHOT SHOTS HWOTS

**johnn** : ITS FOUR IN THE AFTERNOON

\---

**more like HUNKules** : help

**johnn** : WHATS WRONG

**little lion** : ARE YOU DEAD

**more like HUNKules** : I

**more like HUNKules** : I can't figure out how to open the door

**little lion** : what why

**more like HUNKules** : idk

**little lion** : you're not even out here

**more like HUNKules** : I'm downstairs

**little lion** : oh my god

**little lion** : give me like five minutes I'm not wearing pants

**more like HUNKules** : okay

\---

**little lion** : HELP

**laf** : WHATS WRONG

**little lion** : HERCULES CANNOT WALK STRAIGHT

**little lion** : WHY HE WAS M O R E COHERENT TEXTING US THAN HE WAS BEFORE I DONT KNOW

**little lion** : HES LEANING ON ME BUT I AM VERY SMALL AND LACK ANY STRENGTH TO DO ANYTHING AT ALL SO IM STRUGGLING AND WE'RE ABOUT TO HIT STAIRS

**laf** : OH MY GOD OKAY WE'RE COMING

\---

**johnn** : heS ASLEEP

**laf** : IM SWEATING THAT WAS A  C H A L L E N G E

**little lion** : I can literally get muscles from that

**johnn** : you don't need them

**little lion** : you'd think I already have them after carrying the weight of my sins but

**little lion** : guess not

**laf** : oh my god

**johnn** : jesus christ

**little lion** : ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**Author's Note:**

> these are literally all I want to write rn idk idk bear with me


End file.
